“Who you are can depend on who you meet.”
~ Unknown
“Don’t walk behind me, I won’t lead. Don’t walk in front of me, I won’t follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend.”
~ Albert Camus
“If you want to go fast go alone, if you want to go far go together.”
~ Kenyan Proverb
In our last blog, Fernando Saldanha, Managing Director with Barnes Management Group shared his thoughts on Mentorship and introduced Carlos McDonald whom he mentors. For this edition of our blog, we have asked Carlos to share his thoughts on the topic, Mentorship Matters.
My name is Carlos McDonald and I am a former at risk youth who was once in child welfare. I struggled to make it by living on the streets and surviving while seeking a chance to change my life. I have had many mentors along my way and due to the severity of my situation, I heeded the wise words of my mentors, and through much success I saw the value of listening to wisdom, and have come to great understanding because of it. In turn, I have become a mentor myself. I have been able to find success in mentoring as it has become a passion of mine to help others who were once in my position. As a mentor for our youth I remain open and humble to continue to be mentored personally and professionally, perpetuating “growth and development never stopping” the ethos of my voyage.
I can’t begin to describe how wonderful it is to be able to witness someone face a challenge and overcome it because of well timed words, and well placed actions. For those of you who have experienced this — isn’t it amazing!? It’s inspiring, uplifting, it has interesting effects as it can fill a void you have in your heart, and even right a wrong you’ve been trying to correct. Powerful, isn’t it? Knowing you’ve done some good in the world. In the beginning it was often the case that I didn’t realize that I had just made a big difference in someone’s life until I met them later on in life, and I saw the changes for myself. And after greeting them they would kindly admit that the reason they made it this far, was because of me. Because of me? Could you have imagined that from the get go upon your first time helping someone? They were just actions and words, not a big deal … “Oh sonny boy, but it was a big deal, and you are sadly mistaken.” One would have to wonder, is the power to change our future REALLY in our hands? Being in the right place at the right time to help someone get through whatever it is they are going through — THAT can change the trajectory of a person’s life by a few degrees and have an impact resulting in the change of an entire future. The once former foster child is now a provincial youth advocate leader. The once bullied and failure-prone street kid now becomes a sports star legend. Trajectory, change, influence, care, hope … these are just a few words that begin to only scratch the surface of what it is to be a mentor. I want to emphasize that a world change can happen either positively or negatively and THAT is why mentorship matters. I want to stress that we cannot always be in the right place at the right time, it’s just not humanly possible … so it’s up to all of us to become mentors, to have that role in our back pocket, just in case … and that is why Mentorship Matters. It’s often times in relational circumstances that we do realize that we have just made a big difference in someone’s life, we realize we CAN make a difference in someone’s life, and that’s why mentorship matters. The future is never certain as we are always making choices which either has a good or bad result. A CEO of today can be the homeless person of tomorrow, just by a few poor decisions. When it comes to our youth we shouldn’t take it too lightly and we should think and feel deeply, after all their success is our success, it’s worth it. MENTORSHIP MATTERS!
I am blessed to have a great mentor, and role model for me in my life, in Fernando Saldanha. He has taught me how to be a gentleman, a gracious host, and a generous support. He helped me distinguish the positive and negative subtleties of my personal life in terms of relationship dynamics and well being as well as my professional life in terms of social graces and etiquette towards other professional colleagues and peers, especially senior peers. He helps me see and realize that the journey is not over for me even though I feel like it is sometimes, and in fact, it has only just begun –which is chronically exciting. He helps me believe in myself by staying connected with me and reminding me of who I am becoming, which he would argue — I already am. Fernando is established and well respected in the community and can support and lead with a ton of experience, humbleness, and humility. He is well mannered, and has a kind natured approach to life with a great sense of sarcastic humour which we both share, and seem to delight in at times. Fernando is not afraid to tell me how it is, and can be sharp when needed, which commands my respect, loyalty, and trust. He is very sensitive to my feelings and keeps an eye on our progress as mentor and mentee which means ensuring the healthy growth and development of our therapeutic and working relationship. But, Fernando is not only just my mentor he is also my friend, and he has proven that by sticking by me when my stepfather passed away, and not judging me for my fits of anger or any emotional or mental instability that I may assume for whatever reason. Fernando is a great ally, and I can honestly say that the reason I made it this far, was because of him. Mentorship Matters!
Written by Carlos McDonald, Program Coordinator, Regional Mentorship Program. Carlos is also involved with Barnes Management Group as a Youth Engagement Consultant.
Photo Copyright: Alexsandar Mijatovic, 123RF
